i am mommy

Seven Steps to Better Parenting (from a un-perfect parent)

I wrote this on a 'good' day.

I have often referred back to it on a 'bad' day.

This is how I get through.

Seven Steps to Being a Better Parent

1. I start my day with God.

In prayer, in the Bible, in meditation.  I make a conscience effort to give my day to Him.  To honor Him with my thoughts, my actions, my words.

2. I listen.

To God, to myself, to my kids.  It just takes a moment to stop and give someone my full attention, but it often makes a huge  and powerful and significant difference in my relationship with them.

3. I practice patience.

I heard Joyce Meyers once say that you should never ask God for more patience.  The reason being,  He will then give you trials that will test your patience, as the only way to become better at it is to learn through it.

4. I set goals and accomplish them.

Usually keeping it simple.  Do a load of laundry.  Empty the dishwasher.  Go grocery shopping.  Hug my kids 10 times each.  A small sense of accomplishment goes a long way in my house.

5. I keep the promises I make to myself.

I make promises to myself all the time that I do not keep. "I am going to start exercising more."  "I am going to clean the bathroom today."  "I am only going to eat one more Oreo."

And then I do eat another Oreo.  And don't work out.  And neglect the bathroom for another day.  The weight of those un-kept promises is a heavy one.

I want to be able to trust myself.  To know that I have the strength... the strength in Christ who strengthens me... I want to be able to trust my own word.

6. I strive to please.  Instead of striving to be pleased.

This helps me to remember the servant heart that God wants me to have.  The most wonderful thing about this is that I am often more fulfilled when I do for others first.  

7. I have my priorities straight.

Mine are as follows: God, Family, Home, Community, Personal Achievements

When I have personal achievements first, like say, I make it a priority to get a blog post up before I play with the kids, then my mentality changes.  I focus on sitting at my computer typing and being able to hit that publish button.  Then if a sweet little boy comes up to me and tells me I need to come and see what he has built, I say, "In a second.  Mommy just wants to finish this..."

When my priorities are out of whack, the people I care most about suffer. 

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I have discovered that parenting is Intentional.  When I wake up in the morning and just dive right in... do not make intentional choices... that is when I am setting myself up for failure.

I have to mentally prepare myself for my triggers.

My triggers are:

• fighting
• talking back
• disobedience
• disrespect

It is pretty safe to assume that this is going to happen all day long one of these is going to occur throughout the day.  If I can be one step ahead... or intentional... in how I am going to respond, chances are I won't lose my patience and I won't react in a way that just doesn't help. (yelling, over reacting, etc.)

I screw up a lot.  It has been a really heavy burden lately.  I have been torn up inside.  I have such guilt... I almost feel like my mistakes are ruining my kids' childhood. 

That is not how God wants me to view it.

I love that my sins and failures and mistakes can be placed at Jesus' feet every single night.  And that every single day I wake up with new hope and encouragement and faith in Him that He will give me the tools I need right when I need them.

I love being a parent and want so desperately for that love to be reflected in the way I parent. 

When I practice these seven guidelines, I have found that I am more able to respond to conflict with love instead of frustration. 

I know I have much left to learn!

And I am so thankful that I have such wonderful, thoughtful, intelligent, and spiritual friends there helping me along the way.  

Thank you!

Obsession

Is it unhealthy to be obsessed with your kids?

Please do not answer unless you are willing to say no.

Today.  Its Parker. 

Yesterday is was Audrey and tomorrow it will be Colton... but today, this little man has a firm grip on mom's old heartstrings.

OK.  So maybe I am slightly obsessed with his lashes too.  

My Kids Finally Got To Play in the Leaves...

Kinda.

My precious offspring have been BEGGING me for rainbow pancakes.  I, in totally uncharacteristic fashion, had no desire whatssoever to make them.

BUT!  I did not want to leave them empty handed (stomached...uh...whatever). So we compromised and had some fall inspired leaf pancakes.

They loved them.  And thanks to Minnesota's lovely weather, it was the closest we got to playing in the leaves this year.

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I may have neglected to mention, but Chad has been gone for the last 7 days.

I have been home alone, watching the kids alone, baking alone, feeling generally sorry for myself.

Alone.

I had a big huge pity party and invited no one.

However, after showing Chad a few pictures from this past week (he got home around 3:30 today!) I sorta realized that I have kept pretty busy with being a mommy to three and baker to many.

I made this cake for my sweet as pie neighbor Jessica.  It was for her dad.

It just so happened that I had made a bunch of turkey cake balls in the exact same colors for my bakerella post on i am baker, so she had the brilliant idea of adding them to her cake...

...why didn't I think of that???

Much more fun!

I also made some royal icing frosted cookies for Bridget over at Bake at 350.

AND, I am baking some cookies for some sweet blogging friends right now!

 

Have you ever made sugar cookies?  You must!  Here... try this recipe.

My other sweety pie neighbor Michele, who just happens to be a photographer, stopped by to help me for a sec the other day.  And guess what?  She loaned me her macro lens.  

(hold up...have to pick my jaw up off the floor)

I could never have taken that picture above without it.

She just casually said, "Here!  You use it!  I don't need it this week."

I was so excited I couldn't even play the old, "Oh no, I couldn't!" game.

I was all... "YES!  Yes I will borrow that lens and thank you very much now give it to me!"

Er, something like that anyway.

Here is a another picture with it...

Do you remember my kids?  This is Audrey.  She will be a year old in a month.

Shut up.  I know. 

I used to take pictures of them and post them on my blog about BEING A MOMMY.

Ugh.

Drop Me a Line (or 500!)

You knew it was coming right?? 

Its my favorite season second only to Christmas itself.

Christmas card season.

I love Christmas cards. 

And not just the store bought ones (although there are some really lovely ones) but I love handmade and full of pictures and long and detailed.  The longer the better! 

Want to write three pages on how your youngest got her first tooth?  Or how you found $20 in your coat pocket and went on to pay it forward? Or how your hubby shot his first boar?

I love it.  I soak up every single detail and read them over and over again.

I even put them in a pretty basket and read them again and again all throughout the year.

I think I just realized how odd I am.

Anyway...

Did I mention I love Christmas card season??

If you would like to receive a Christmas card from me this year... full of pictures and details you probably already know if you read my blog, please drop me a line!  (please leave a comment here so I have links)

email me at manda2177@aol.com

If you would like to send our family a card from your family, be sure to tell me so I can get you our address!!

Yeah!

I'm so excited!!

Bon Appetit*

What my kids eat for lunch.

 

 

                 

What I eat for lunch.

               

Just sayin.

Amanda Demanda

Did anyone have time to go and see how their blog rated yesterday?? 

I just wanted to share my results with you.  It said my blog rated 96 out of 100.  What wonderful news!  Now I can go off and put adds on my blogs and make the millions of dollars I should be making right?

Not so fast.

See, they have this other option of adding in other blogs to see how they compare... so for laughs I added thepioneerwoman.com.

It was pretty evident that she was going to creme me, but ya know, I am a glutton for that stuff.

Uh, um... yeah.

According to that system, the Pioneer Woman (do I even need to tell you how popular her blog is?  Her last contest had close to 36,000 comments.  In one day.) scored lower then me.

It said her blog is a 95 and mine is a 96.

cough, cough

So, once I realized how terribly flawed and inaccurate this system must be, I got over the temporary ego boost and went back to the real stats.  

I had 402 hits yesterday.  I am pretty sure Pioneer woman had around 400,000. 

Moral of the story!  Dont let some dumb website monitoring tool tell you your blogs value.

Have you spoken Gods Truth in your writing?  Have you made someone smile?  Have you shared precious pictures of loved friends and family?  Have you pushed yourself to achieve a bit more then you did yesterday?

Then, my friend, you are a success. :)

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I just want to take a moment to share with you someone who I adore.

Her name is Debi, and she blogs at Just As I Am.

Debi is an amazing writer and has the most pure and motivating love for  the Lord.  But that's not all I love about Debi.

She is one of the best photographers I have ever seen.

If you scroll through the posts on her blog, you will see the wide variety of things she captures with her camera... anywhere from her gorgeous grand-kids to an antique doorknob.

Look at the most unique way she announced a winner on her blog! 

This is Debi's photography blog.

The reason I wanted to share Debi with you today is because Debi is the creative sweetheart who designed my new blog, i am baker.

She worked her tail off for me... answering silly question and meeting outrageous demands... (have I mentioned I am an outrageous demander??  Just call me Amanda Demanda.)

I am so thankful for Debi...for her talent, her artistic view, her patience, she willingness to bear her soul through her art.

Stop by and let her inspire you... she is truly amazing!

(and if you are the Florida... set up an appointment and let her capture some of your precious moments!)

Things Successful Bloggers *Do UPDATED

Check out this site and rate your blog or your web page.  This works for any domain!  Leave a comment...let me know how you rank... I bet you will be surprised!

After a bit I will let you what my rank was!

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You may see lots of * (those) today.  I kinda like them.  I just may be using them a lot more.

You may remember a few of my previous posts titled 'Things Successful Bloggers Do That I Do Not Do'.

Lets re-cap.

1. Have a life outside their blog.

2. Don't beat a dead horse.

3. Go to Blogher.

4. Have lots of readers.

5. Seem to have it all.

You ready for number six?

Its a dooise.

Here goes.

Things Successful Bloggers Do That I Do Not Do

#6 Swear.

Really. 

I should start by clarifying what swearing is to me.

Worst offense: Saying 'Oh My God'  (OMG) or taking the Lords name in vein. 

Next worst offense: The rest of them.  Wikipedia says from 1986 to 2006 that mainly the same top ten swear words are used. (they list them if you care to know)

I do not consider crap a swear word. 

Now.  I do not want to call people out (ok, I kinda do, but I wont)... but you know who they are.

Those ubber successful bloggers that maintain a steady flow of profanity in their writing.  The folks that can't seem to discuss their driving or their grocery store excursion or their husband without swearing.

The smart and sassy and popular bloggers that don't mind dropping the f* bomb in casual conversation. 

The witty Stay at Home Moms who let the s* word work as an adjective more often then not.

I am not talking about the blogger who has said one questionable word in the last 372 posts.

Here is where I stand.

I try not to swear.

Not on my blog and not in my everyday life.  And on the rare occasion that I do swear, it is in moments of anger or fear where I am not thinking clearly and I immediately regret letting those words escape from my mouth.

See, I sorta feel like it demeans me.  That when I give in and tell my dear hubby that I am tired of this *stuff*,  from that point on in the conversation we cease to be productive.

Its a fight.  A war of the words.  No longer a discussion that could potentially yield a positive result.

(I am one of those awful people who fight to win (sorry honey!, I'm working on it) so I hate to give up even the most trivial of points)

And to be honest, when I am reading a blog that curses, it is a huge distraction.  I see *that* word or *a* word that is not allowed in any G rated movie and I stumble. 

My eyes go back to it.  I reread it over again trying to understand its context. 

I get frustrated and flustered.  And fidgety. 

Look at me using *f* words.

At the core of the issue... the true reason that I am trying to hard to avoid using swear words in my speech... I find profanity disrespectful.

And I do not want to disrespect you.  I like you. 

The way I talk in my everyday life should be the way I would speak to someone I have great admiration and respect for. 

If I can filter my speech to a pastor or a parent, why would I not allow that same courtesy to my friend or a reader or spouse?  Do they not deserve the same respect?

So here goes.  I know I am the minority here.  What you do think about profanity?

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Whats In Your Trunk?

Instead of having a fall carnival or festival, this year our church did a trunk or treat for halloween.

Prior to this announcement I have never heard of a trunk or treat.

I am now aware that I am the only person in the world who had never heard of it and from now on I will be taking mandatory breaks outside of the box I am getting so comfortable in.

Thank you.

Most cars involved did really fun and creative and interactive designs.

 

We, uh.... well.... we sorta opted for simplistic design principles.

Our churches' trunk-n-treat was open to the general public, so I was tickled when one child approached so cautiously and whispered,

"What is that?" as she pointed up.

"Well, thats a cross sweetheart." I said with a smile.

Her mom got closer and said to her tiny sprite of a daughter, "You know what that is!"

She looked at me with mild frustration... "She's just being shy."

So I leaned in closer and said, "Do you know who died on the cross for you?"

She looked up at me with a mixture of curiousness and fear in her big eyes...

"Jesus did.  All for you.  He loves you that much!"

Her eyes crinkled a bit at the corners as a smile creeped onto her face.

Either she was delighted in hearing those words, or happy I had just dumped 27 suckers into her bag.

I'm taking the first choice. 

Just wait!  You are not getting away that easy!I just have to show you pictures of my little ones dressed up! 

Yeah.  They had fun.

How was your Halloween?  I'd love to hear all about it!  If you blogged about it, feel free to leave a link so we can all check it out!

Can We Celebrate Together?

Its been in the works for awhile now...

And it is finally coming together....

Please take a moment and visit me at my new baking blog.  It is an extension of this blog, therefore named...

i am baker

And please let me know what you think!

This Is The Scariest Thing I Can Imagine

1. A giant picture of me on the computer.

oh yeah.  and spiders.

Have a SAFE and FUN Halloween!